How to Take a Break

If you’re like me, you have this internal drive that tells you to do, do, do at all times. Do you have spare time (ha!)? You should be cleaning the kitchen or reading something educational or working on your next writing project or checking your email or… This internal monologue is exhausting, and even more-so in the midst of COVID-19, when my brain is mush and some days I can barely construct a complete sentence.

I read somewhere on Twitter that the current global pandemic has created an ongoing stress response in all of our brains. It’s hard to function when your brain is focused on surviving, not thriving. But after months (and months) of sheltering in place while worrying about family, friends and the state of the world, my brain had to adjust. And also, stuff had to get done.

I let myself grieve, I let myself hope (and despair and hope and despair). And here we are. It’s August, we’re still at home. The state of Texas is not doing great in terms of fighting COVID-19, and we are choosing to be very cautious. I have finally accepted the current normal (I refuse to believe this is the new normal), as has my brain. So I spent the last month editing my manuscript, which had been resting in Ulysses since Dec. 31, 2019 when I typed “The End.”

Despite the first half of 2020 being a wash (besides giving birth, which is a lot of work), I’m finally making progress with my manuscript. So why did I decide to take a break from my manuscript just when I’m getting my momentum back? I’m considering it the ultimate act of self care. I’m not doing nothing. I don’t think I’m capable of that. But what I am doing is cutting myself some slack. Not forcing myself to create every night. Instead, I’m soaking in baby snuggles, watching the TV shows I missed during my non-existent maternity leave and checking some writing-adjacent tasks off my list. I’m updating my website, working on my query letter, writing my synopsis, honing my agent list and dusting off the old blog.

Being able to tackle these smaller tasks, while taking a break from the one giant task of perfecting my manuscript, feels like a huge accomplishment in itself. My hope is that by the time I’m ready to return to my manuscript, I’ll have a solid foundation built from all of these other tasks. And I’ll be better off overall. At the very least, I’ll feel a little more relaxed. I’ll have laughed a little more. I’ll have enjoyed this new phase of being stuck together at all times, yet feeling more isolated than ever.

I know this is a season, even if a very long one. And I know one day it will end. I’ll go back to the office, my girls will go to school. Travel will pick up again. The world will keep turning. And although I’d love to go wander the aisles of Target or write in a coffee shop or drink margaritas on a patio, for now this is enough.

Writer Gear

As one of those kids who got disproportionately excited about buying new school supplies, I'm always interested in new gear to help with my writing. Now really, you don't need any of the gear, but it's fun. And at least for me, I like to have quality tools so I can focus on the writing without needing to find another pen or having a notebook that keeps flipping closed. Here are a few of my favorite writery things:

1. Macbook Air - I know this is a rather expensive tool, but it's worth way more than its weight in gold (Get it? Because it barely weighs anything... Never mind.). If you're a Mac and a writer, I can't recommend this computer enough. The battery lasts forever, meaning you spend less time being that annoying girl in the coffee shop who is awkwardly looking for a spare outlet. You can also get a really rad case that gives you some major bookish cred.

2. Scrivener - I've posted about it before, and I won't bore you again, but this software blows Microsoft Word out of the water.

3. Moleskine Large Ruled Notebook - What's good enough for Papa Hemingway is good enough for me. I go for the basic lined journal. It opens flat and stays that way. The paper is nice, it has a handy bookmark and elastic closure, and best of all, it doesn't have an on/off switch, so you never have to put it away on an airplane. I keep mine with me at all times, just in case inspiration strikes.

4. Fisher Bullet Space Pen - I know what you're thinking. Is that really necessary? And maybe it's not, but it certainly is cool. The nice thing about the bullet is that it's compact, but when the cap is placed on the end, it becomes a standard pen length. The ink cartridge is sealed and pressurized, so it writes upside down or sideways, and it has an estimated shelf life of 100 years, so chances are you'll never have to buy a pen again. Just don't lose it.

5.  Snap Backpack from Everlane - Now that I have all of this writer gear, I need a place to put it. I'm a big fan of Everlane. They make quality products at reasonable prices, and their Weekender is the perfect travel bag. I recently purchased the snap backpack in green, and I can't wait to start carrying it around town instead of my college Jansport. It's a little more mature, even if it is still a backpack. Hopefully people will stop confusing me for a student.

So there you have it. My writing necessities. What's on your list?

Writing Conference Tips for Introverts

If you're anything like me, the thought of a writing conference is both exhilarating and terrifying. I love to learn from the experts, so a weekend with authors, agents and editors is ideal. However, having to talk to said authors, agents and editors is fairly intimidating for an introvert, considering I'd rather be reading at home on a Friday night than, you know, interacting with people.

DFW Writers' Conference 2013

Still, a writing conference is a great opportunity, so I put my fears (and social awkwardness) aside for one weekend to attend the DFW Writers' Conference in June. It was a great experience, and I learned a whole lot about writing. I also learned what to do (and what not to do) next time. If you're an introvert like me, check out the tips below for ways to stay sane in an environment that might otherwise be incredibly overwhelming.

1. Attend icebreaker sessions. If you're like me, the thought of attending an icebreaker session is somewhat akin to the threat of water boarding. However, it's a great way to meet a few people that will become friendly faces throughout the conference. Who knows, you might meet someone from your town or exchange email addresses with a potential critique partner. It also sets the tone for a weekend of getting out of your shell just a bit to really experience what the conference has to offer.

2. Sit at empty tables. Too intimidated to approach a table full of people, especially when they're already in the middle of a conversation? I feel your pain. Choose the less daunting option of sitting at a table with only a few people. Chances are, the other people are introverts just like you and will be relieved to have a new friend. Or, pick a completely empty table to catch up on your conference schedule. You likely won't be alone for long.

3. Ask people what they write. The great thing about a writing conference is that there is already a common interest inherent to all attendees... writing! It's a built-in conversation starter, and a great way to get people talking. Likewise, know your answer to this question before you arrive, because you'll get it over and over again. It also helps to have a few comparable titles in your back pocket to help explain your interests.

4. Use social media. Social media is a great way to connect with other conference attendees. If you're on Twitter, follow the authors, editors, agents and other writers. Tweet tips from the conference, share photos on Facebook and interact with other attendees without the intimidation of face to face conversation. Also, make sure your social media icons are actual photos (not your cat), so your fellow attendees can recognize who they've been tweeting with in real life.

5. Take a break. Everyone needs a break, but especially introverts. No panels catching your eye? Take that time to grab a coffee and read, catch up on emails or just relax. No one wins a prize for attending the most events and panels at a conference, and you'll be much more open to learning and meeting new people once you've a little time to recharge.

6. Bring a sweater. This is less introvert-related and more comfort related. If you're always cold like me, bring a sweater. Conference rooms are notorious for being air conditioned to an extreme degree, and you'll have a much easier time listening if your body isn't fighting off the first stages of hypothermia.

Any other tips for introverts at writing conferences? I need all the help I can get sometimes.

And on a somewhat related note, a guide to the care and keeping of introverts from Fast Company, via A Cup of Jo. I'm tempted to post this on my office door as an instruction manual.

Wisdom From Gary Provost

As I continue writing my manuscript, I'm thinking more and more about sentence structure and length, about making an impact with more than just the words on the page. Gary Provost provides us a great example of the power of a well-crafted sentence: “This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.”

On Resolutions and a New Year

I'm returning to the regularly scheduled programming after a short break that feels like an eternity. Anyone else? In the time I was away, I did a lot of things, including getting married (and the stress leading up to that event, especially for an introvert who avoids the spotlight), traveling to Belize, continuing to travel as part of my newish job and celebrating the holidays with my family. Between wedding, work and family, I don't want to count the number of trips I've made back and forth from Austin to Dallas. It would just make me sad. I got back a little over a week ago, and I'm going back next week. See? I can't talk about it.

Moving on. In the midst of all the of crazy, I also started a new writing project. It's still in the early stages, about 10,000 words right now, but I'm hoping to reach the 50,000 words by the end of the month. Cross your crossable extremities. I'm using Scrivener for this project, and loving it, but I can help but feel I'm barely skimming the surface on all of the features. I'll have to work on that.

So it's the start of a new year, and I'm juggling a lot of things, including being a new wife (what!?), being a homeowner, having a newish job in a very new industry and tackling a big writing projects. And it's also the time for resolutions. Oh, why not? I clearly have loads of time. Here goes...

1. Finish my writing project.

2. Learn more about writing and publishing.

3. Record all of the books I read throughout the year.

4. Begin renovations on the condo.

5. Learn how to keep the condo clean.

6. Cook more often, and try new recipes.

7. Be open to new friendships.

There you have it. In making this public, I'm subjecting myself to judgement and ridicule. Be kind.

Writing Tools

There's a lot of discussion in the writing world about writing tools. Some people use open source tools like Scribus or Storybook. Other people use Microsoft Word or Google Docs, so they can access their work from any computer. Microsoft Word is rife with problems (and expensive!), and I don't like the functionality of Google Docs, although it works in a pinch. For me, it's Scrivener, because the design just makes sense. I can compile research, work in multiple documents, arrange them on my cork board and eventually compile everything into a standard manuscript format. And if I ever decide to write screen plays or non-fiction, there are formatting options for that too.

Which writing tools do you use?

The Loss of a Great Writer

The loss of a great writer is like a swift punch to the stomach. It comes out of nowhere and completely takes my breath away, leaving me not only mourning the death, but also the loss of the incredible works of art I won't get to consume. We've lost so many great writers this year, and I hope to write about each one that touched me in time, but the recent death of Nora Ephron weighs heavily on my mind. Originally a journalist, she transitioned into writing plays and novels and writing, directing and producing films. I grew up watching movies like Sleepless and Seattle and When Harry Met Sally, and her words have long since become everyday phrases in my family.

Ephron was gifted at exposing the humor of everyday life and love, including topics like relationships, divorce, death and friendship - all in a relatable, eerily accurate way. I remember laughing repeatedly at the seemingly ridiculous scene in When Harry Met Sally when Jess and Marie move in together and have a huge fight about that "stupid, wagon wheel, Roy Rogers garage sale coffee table!"

Several years later, I'm now in the process of moving in with my fiancé and unintentionally recreating the embarrassing wagon wheel coffee table argument, only this time it's about a bright blue, 17-foot-long kayak.

So Nora, if you're up there reading blogs in your spare time, know that you touched my life and inspired me to be a better writer. To try to capture even a hint of the humanity you put into your work. And I will work each day to be the heroine of my life, and not the victim, as you advised in your '96 Wellesley commencement address.

You should also know that I'm now 50 percent owner of one very blue, very large kayak that resides on my patio.

On Careers

I recently started a new job, which has me thinking about careers. I've always been ambitious and was lucky enough to find a great job in my chosen career field not too long after graduating from college, and again found a great job in a similar field when I moved to Austin. Many of my friends have not been so lucky. As a deadline-driven person, working in public relations and advertising is a great fit. However, these careers often extend beyond the 40 hour work week. As I continue to pursue this line of career, I am increasingly aware of the need for balance. Balance between work and home. Balance between friends and family. Balance between busy time and down time.

As I commit myself to writing, I need to also find time to write in between all of these other important things. I definitely don't have it figured out, but I plan to keep working toward the goal of having a successful career and pursuing my dream of becoming a published author at the same time.

As I work through this challenge, I'll share what does and doesn't work. Do you have any tips for finding time to write and creating balance in life? If you do, I'd love to hear them. And if you're still figuring it out like me, I'd love to hear about that too.

Speaking of balance, check out Martin, a fabulous Labradoodle who achieves amazing feats of balance in and around New York City. She has even been featured in the New York Post! I wonder if I can convince Lola to do that?

I am a Writer

I am a writer. In secret.

At work, I write all day long... press releases, pitches, media alerts, plans, creative briefs, etc.

But at night, on the weekends, and in my head, I'm a real writer. The kind of writer who puts her deepest, most intimate thoughts on paper as a form of self expression and self preservation.

Rumor has it, Stephen King writes ten pages a day. Even on holidays. I'm lucky if I write ten pages a year of my own work, beyond public relations. I aim to change that.

Starting now, I'm making a commitment to the writer within to write for myself, in addition to all of the writing I do for other people.

Challenge accepted.